Lessons in the Goat: Day 3 March 21 Water đźś„: Emotions
My family is crazy.
For years, I was embarrassed by my family. I had no tolerance for my family’s flaws, their dysfunctions, their behaviors.
Now I see that all families have undesirable codes of conduct. The most dysfunctional families are the families that think they are without flaws. My family knows full well they are flawed, and we can even laugh about it much of the time. I am grateful for that. Now, I have compassion for my family and for myself.
Related Expertise
“Power struggles, competition, excessive criticism, conditional love, substance misuse, and excessive expectations can all be common characteristics of dysfunctional families” (Brewer, 2023).
Inspired Action
Accepting the disagreeable parts of your family does not mean we are stuck in dysfunction. It does mean we can settle down and stop raging against the storm. We can name the behaviors that cause pain, then begin to determine our own boundaries and more loving, effective responses. Let’s begin by allowing grace and love to soften us. Then we must set a course for changing our own ineffective responses, our part in the system, and possibly our role in the family. One small step at a time.
